Wednesday, February 23, 2011

I think this one is useful

What we think, or what we know, or what we believe is, in the end, of little consequence. The only consequence is what we do.
- John Ruskin

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Far

It takes a life-time to understand life.

Monday, February 21, 2011

QQ

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing."
- Helen Keller

Friday, February 18, 2011

Summary

A hope without reason, can cause an inescapable suffering.

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Void

Nature is not kind. It's not cruel either. It just doesn't care.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Tuesday, February 01, 2011

QQ

We forfeit three-fourths of ourselves in order to be like other people.
- Arthur Schopenhauer

Women want mediocre men, and men are working hard to become as mediocre as possible.
- Margaret Mead

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Looking back

I lived a good life. Yes, I did.

QQ

"It's time to start living the life
you've imagined"
- Henry James

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Delusion

I am still not awake. This is very painful.

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

QQ

"Never give up, never, never give up."
- Winston Churchill

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Reason and Meaning

1. The concept of reasoning is falwed. I really need to write a book on this matter, or at least an artcile elaborating on it. In short, the idea that, if certain event B occurs (almost)always after event A, then A is the reason of B. It is a big fallacy. This only tells they happened so, so far. The term 'reason' should be reserved for something other than just coincidence. Yes, all in science so far, we have mistaken coninncidence for reason. Like the tune of a music, there is just one underlying law in this universe. There is no causal dependency between any two events in the universe. All events are causally linked directly to only one underlying rhythm. That rhythm itself if the mother or the equivalent of creator.

2. The concept of meaning is flawwed. I need to write more on this as well. It could be a separate book or a separate chapter in the book about reasoning. The idea is, the concept of meaning has no element of reality. It's an artifact of our cognition. Outside our thinking, there is no existence of meaning. No existence means that, there is no verifiable effect in nature that can give positive evidence of meaning. On the other hand, there is no phenomenon in nature that needs a meaning to be explained and it is not possible also to have a consistent description of nature by assuming meaning's existence.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

64 kilo bytes of RAM

Two elderly couples were enjoying friendly conversation when one of the men asked the other," Fred, how was the memory clinic you went to last month?" "Outstanding," Fred replied. "They taught us all the latest psychological techniques: visualization, association, etc. It was great." "That's great! And what was the name of the clinic?" Fred went blank. He thought and thought, but couldn't remember. Then a smile broke across his face and he asked, "What do you call that flower with the long stem and thorns?"
"You mean a rose?"
"Yes, that's it!" He turned to his wife, "Rose, what was the name of that memory clinic?"

Saturday, December 18, 2010

That's a good one

A mechanic was removing a cylinder head from the motor of a Harley motorcycle when he spotted a well-known heart surgeon in his shop.
The surgeon was there, waiting for the service manager to come and take a look at his bike.
The mechanic shouted across the garage, "Hey, Doc, can I ask you a question?"

The surgeon a bit surprised, walked over to the mechanic working on the motorcycle. The mechanic straightened up, wiped his hands on a rag and asked, "So Doc, look at this engine. I open its heart, take valves out, fix 'em, put 'em back in, and when I finish, it works just like new. So how come I get such a small salary and you get the really big bucks, when you and I are doing basically the same work?"

The surgeon paused, smiled and leaned over, and whispered to the mechanic...
"Try doing it with the engine running."

Friday, December 17, 2010

Life used to be good!

Oh gosh.. do I miss 24...
and Family Guy,
and Futurama!

Damn it!

24 is having a vote for the best lines in season 6. Almost every single line was awesome. They all rock. Some of my top favorites:

"Drop your weapon"

"First lets make something clear: the only reason you're still conscious is because I don't want to carry you"

"I give you my Word"

"Do you understand the difference between dying for something and dying for nothing? the only reason i fought so hard to stay alive from China was because i didn't want to die for nothing...today i can die for something... my way, my choice..."

"You think you know about pain? You don't know anything yet."

‎"you know me, you've read my profile"

"Give me the names"

"i'm done playing games. i'm going to take out your right eye, then i'm going to cut out your left, and i'm going to keep cutting you into you tell me what i need to know."

"You're going to tell me what I want to know, It's just a matter of how much you want it to hurt."

"If you are lying to me, I'm gonna make this the worst day in your life. You understand me?"

http://www.jackbauersgreatest.com/main_ff.php

A nonsense of popular condolence

I guess I need to spell it out loud here. The most common approach I have seen to console a sad person is something like this. They ask the sufferer to look at other people's condition, which are possibly much worse. And then because of that comparison, they expect the sufferer to get some hope (? that more pain is waiting?) or solace (?that you are better than your brother?) or something (I don't know!) that would make him/her feel better.

Well here is the rub. How in the world, is another one's suffering making my suffering any less, if not more? As a person I feel actually much worse when I find that it's not only me, but someone else also is suffering. Isn't this the natural reaction as a sentient being? How am I supposed to feel any better by looking around and finding people that are suffering even worse, on top of my own suffering mind?

It's like gaping another person's broken car to get solace, instead of fixing one's own broken one. It's really nonsensical.

The Hardline of Nature's Ethics

Death is not a cruel event by itself - but, things that lead to it could be.
Death is the final deffense mechanism to take a being out of suffering, when the pain is beyond the limit. Hence it is actually a mercy.

The Power of Indirection

"There is no problem in computer science that can't be solved by another level of indirection."

I believe this is still valid, if we drop the phrase "computer science". Just another level of indirection :)

Thank you, Vincent Freeh.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

The primary factor

Happiness is mainly a property of your mind, not a derivative of your state of affairs.

At least, I would like to believe it that way.

Monday, December 06, 2010

Innovation

The fundamental precondition for innovation is probably the ability to remove the superfluous relations among concepts that constrain our thought from leveraging the complete freedom of the truth. We must open our mind to an unprecedented level and constantly challenge the limits set by our current understanding of the universe. Only this level of courage can take us closer to the truth.

Sunday, December 05, 2010

Dreams

I dream of walking along very narrow cliffs many a times. This link is interesting.

http://www.whiteestate.org/sop/2000/story.html

Some of my other recurring dreams include:

Mazes, a building or structure with many stories and doors, I am not finding my destination in there. Most of the time I will start from somewhere and then when I try to return there, the path would seem to have changed, even if I remember the map.

In other dreams, I will be traveling on some sort of vehicle or something, but my body would be held so high above that thing that I could fall off any moment. And there is this strong feeling that nobody around me seems to be noticing that.

Sometimes, I will be traveling on very weird roads. Mostly with very narrow and stiff edges. There are other people on these roads.

Or it could be that I am in a journey, or in a place or in some situation where I am in imminent danger of loosing balance and falling from a high altitude. Interestingly, I hardly remember any dream where I actually fell. But these dreams makes me anxious and uncomfortable.

Thursday, December 02, 2010

Indeed

"Formal courtesy between husband and wife is even more important than it is between strangers."

"Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry."

Lazarus Long (Longest lived human science fiction cahracter, 1912 - ? {ranges from 2125 to 4000}, (From the author Robert Heinlein):

Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Three pillars

Kindness
Honesty
Intelligence

I shall never deviate from these three,

QR

"It has been my philosophy of life that
difficulties vanish when faced boldly."
- Isaac Asimov

Wednesday, November 03, 2010

Lie

A 'lie' has a very powerful reproductive system.

Sunday, September 26, 2010

To exist is to change.

Friday, August 13, 2010

I think it applies to me as well

The scientists of today think deeply instead of clearly. One must be sane to think clearly, but one can think deeply and be quite insane.
- Nikola Tesla

Sunday, July 18, 2010

QQ

No man remains quite what he was when he recognizes himself.
- Thomas Mann

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

The Secret of Life

Is not about the self. It is about the others.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Beyond

Every time I've followed the chain of reasoning down to the furthest I could, the last thing I explored, has been love and kindness; self-explained and completely satisfying

The Spirit never dies.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Could you Pause?

I never liked the fact about time. It flows and makes everything disappear into the unreachable past. I don't like it. I want things to stay. I want it to persist.

Things that exist in time, are never ultimate. They are to be overlaid by new events every moment. This illusion is unbreakable.

Definition

Reality is something we do not have control over. The all powerful, therefore, doesn't have a reality.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

This Time

The problem is, it's too damn real.

Saturday, June 05, 2010

For Example

Things you can not make bigger by stretching:
A Heart

Numbers

The concept of numbers would not exist, if there were no two things that are same, at any level.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Essence

What is the fundamental difference between information and energy?

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

QQ

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.
- Hunter S. Thompson
Science is nothing but developed perception, interpreted intent, common sense rounded out and minutely articulated.
- George Santayana
CNN is one of the participants in the war. I have a fantasy where Ted Turner is elected president but refuses because he doesn't want to give up power.
- Arthur C. Clarke

Thursday, May 06, 2010

Pride

Ugliest of prides are of those possessions, one has been bestowed upon, without much effort.

Monday, May 03, 2010

Principle of maximam doubt

If you could afford to doubt something, doubt it.

Living in Future

It's not only what happened, that shapes the mood; instead it is mostly about what is anticipated.

Friday, April 30, 2010

Questions are being satisfied, but, not with answers.

Thursday, April 22, 2010

The Equation

In the totality of life, the essential problem is almost never, a lack of resources. It is lack of intelligent actions.
Lack of sensible decision in one sphere of life could lead to lack of resources in another sphere. And once resources get scantier, the problem becomes a little bit unsolvable, the amount by which the decision was off from the perfect one in the other sphere, to be exact.

Example:
You earn certain amount of money. To grow and live the happiest possible life with that income is a different proposition than increasing the rate at which you earn. To earn more is what I will call, the problem in the other domain with respect to optimal use of what you’ve got. Given a specific income level, there is a worse way, a better way and the best way to use it for achieving maximum happiness. It could be investing wisely, balancing your life-style with your income or many other techniques. The goal is always to increase total happiness. Investing wisely for example does not mean you put up so much for the future that the happiness you will be able to reap in future with the saved money is actually less than the sacrifice you are making today. There is always the best trade-off between different uses of money to achieve the greatest possible happiness. But the subtle point here is, the limit of this happiness is curved by your income level too and that is in a different domain of problem. The amount of money you have is a limiting factor set in the domain of using it wisely.
But if you follow carefully, the argument of lack of resources not being the problem applies to that ‘other domain’ too, and this goes recursively indefinitely. It is not true that you cannot earn more. Given a certain level of potential (intellectual, physical, or whatever it is), you can always find a way to earn the maximum that is possible. Again the limiting factor here is outside the domain, namely, potential, physical possessions for example. Reiterating the point, with the same potential it is possible to earn at different levels only though different levels of intelligence applied in making decisions.

Put in so nicely

"In the words of John Lennon: Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. At The Motley Fool, we firmly believe that saving for tomorrow is not about sacrificing today -- it simply requires striking the right life-money balance. So we'll end this lesson with your moment of Foolish Zen: Living rich and getting rich are not mutually exclusive"

It stays, it glows.

The light of truth can't be extinct. It is only overshadowed, and only for a while.

Monday, April 19, 2010

Up it goes

Pieces are gradually falling into place.

Friday, April 16, 2010

Is it so

The hardest thing to learn in life is which bridge to cross and which to burn.
- David Russell
Don't take my sunshine away.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Power of Understanding

Trying to understand something intead of letting the feelings take over, has always done wonders for me.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Intelligent Morality

If there is ever a conflict between an intelligent decision versus an honest one; guess what: take the intelligent one. Intelligence is the only light you can trust upon. Rest are illusive, evasive and almost always ugly.

Sunday, April 04, 2010

Love is self-explained.

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

A Minimal Human Being

I understand when people make mistakes. I make so many myself.

I also understand, though do not appreciate, when people are being dishonest. After all, we need to often fight with our instincts to remain honest.

But, I absolutely do not understand, how people can be devoid of kindness. The quality of kindness and compassion for others, should be so basic and inherent within a human being, that I can not account for cruelty by any thinkable means, be it lack of money or education or whatever. As soon as one is human, one has to have this quality. It is so essential, a human elemeent. I seriously get clueless when I see people acting cruel for no apparent benefits whatsoever.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

What I am doing Right

Finishing what I start.
Not wandering much while thinking. If I need to change focus, resuming where I left off.

Meet up

My aspirations should dictate my schedule, not the schedule of others. If company is in need, I will almost always find somebody out there with the same aspirations as I do.

Can't oversay

Patience is not always natural. But it sure helps.

Monday, March 22, 2010

Horizon of intelligence

The horizon of our knowledge is limited by the extent of questions we can form.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

I have more freedom, than I had suspected.

Saturday, March 13, 2010

I need to exercise my ability to choose more usefully.

Friday, March 12, 2010

Reality, Truth

In a sequence of logic, not all paths are unique. So I need to soften up bindings of argument leading to a conclusion.
There are almost always a second perspective. And that one may not be any less ideal than the first one.
Reality seems to be multi-faced at least, if not multi-origined. The idea of 'either true or false but not both' may not be honored at the deepest level of reality.

Sunday, March 07, 2010

Realization of Life

The holy grail of all the philosophical questions, the meaning of life, the essential truth about existence - I am one more step closer to it.

Monday, March 01, 2010

Echo

We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others that in the end we become disguised to ourselves.
- Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Monday, February 01, 2010

Do Not Quit

When the going gets tough, the tough gets going.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Growing

The challenge is ramping up.

Life is a game, big time.

There is no end to problems. This is how I grow. Will grow till death.

Lets play it.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

QQ

Mathematics, rightly viewed, possesses not only truth, but supreme beauty - a beauty cold and austere, like that of sculpture.
- Bertrand Russell

Thursday, January 07, 2010

The ethics that is practically in effect

No good deed goes unpunished.
- Clare Booth Luce

Wednesday, January 06, 2010

Pursuit of Happiness

Most men pursue pleasure with such breathless haste that they hurry past it.
- Soren Kierkegaard

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Goes On

It's never done. Not at least until death.

Sunday, December 20, 2009

This is Who I am

Ok. Here is something you all should know about me.

I am NOT an average person. No, I am not. I am not just another person, trying to be 'just happy'. No, please get yourself clear about it. I repeat. I do NOT claim to be an average person, who is happy being imperfect and full of shortcomings. No, I am not happy with that. And for that matter, making myself happy is NOT what I live for.

This is the most commong thing I hear and read about people. They say "I am an ordinary person, I just want to lead a simple life, I am not perfect, I want to be happy, etc etc".

I know I am repeating. But lets get this very very clear. This is NOT how I think. I think: I am a person, yes, with finite capacities in most dimensions, but, I DO WANT to be perfect. Yes, I want to be a great person. I want to excel in those uniquely human faculties, such as morality, honesty, kindness and curiosity. I DONT want to be just happy. Because that is SUCH a vague and meaningless statement. If I say I want to be happy, it does not really mean anything specific. Surely, one can be happy by being hurtful to others feelings. And please dont lecture me by Bullshiting that, harming others cant make one happy. Because it is wrong. There are people, they can be very happy, even when they are being unjust, cruel and dishonest. I don't like it, same as you do not, bu that's just fact. Let's accept it and work from there.

Having said this, I have many sub-goals in life. To be perfect is not a matter of joke. It 'may not' be even possible, specially when the concept of perfect is not clearly defined. But here comes the other important thing I want to talk about today. It is, I think, one should dream BIG. I mean really really BIG. A dream that sounds perfectly possible at the very first glance, is a shame for a dream. Nope I do NOT agree with you that, dreams should be realistic. ABSOLUTELY NOT. Dream by definition has to be 'seemingly' impossible. That's exactly why they are called dreams. I DO NOT understand why people ignore this simple meaning of a dream.

(To Be Continued.)

Saturday, December 19, 2009

What it means to exist

The whole experience of existence is an artifact of time.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

I Will Hold On

Forgiving others unconditionally is the greatest favor I have ever done to myself.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Anybody?

I live in a different world - a world where I am yet to meet a real person.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Unspecified

The truth that can't be touched could be an illusion as well.

There is a general lack of specification in nature. Everything kind of extends to a bit rather than being exact and point like. Nature avoid sharp boundaries and things gradually fall into each other and merge, rather than transforming abruptly. There is a general tendency to resist change of any kind.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Cogito

Clear thought is a very powerful and extremely effective tool for happiness.

Saturday, December 12, 2009

Core

Never hurt anyone. Hurt creates more hurt.

Do not break heart. In my very limited knowledge, I am not sure about almost anything. But I still know, breaking heart is seriously wrong.

Never do injustice. If justice seems unclear, rather sacrifice your own interest to others, to be on the safe side.

Do not fall into the trap of greed. Display gratitude, not need for more.

Accept, don't frustrate. Act, don't complain.

Forgive everyone. Unconditionally.

Raise your moral standard. Everyday, every moment. Raise self respect.

Do not display weakness. Stand up. Protect your dignity.

Uphold Freedom. Do not compromize freedom for comfort. Freedom is the best comfort.

Monday, December 07, 2009

Core

I can not expect justice or fairness from anyone or anything. The ability to understand what is fair and what is not is there, only to judge my own actions.

The reason for this is, there is actually no guarantee in nature, that there will be any kind of justice. So I can't expect that. And the reason why it is applicable for my actions, is, it is necessary for my own happiness. Nature does not have a system of justice in place, but I do internally.

This has tremendous consequences on my life. It means, I need to give priority to others interests over mine and can not expect that from others. It means, I can be judged and punished for my wrong doings, but can not expect that for other's actions. No matter how much I am hurt, I must always be in love. I must transcend the loop of expectation and detach my mechanism of happiness compeletely from the effects of others actions. I have to create a very thick crust around me; which will shield me from the hurts caused by others and stop interfering with my internal world. I need to create a heaven of peace, justice, beauty and kindness within that crust, where I truly live and maintain purity from the outside world forever. This is the core philosophy of my life.

Sunday, December 06, 2009

Horizon

Death is a life long process.

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

The Search

The best answer to a question, generally invalidates the question, instead of giving a direct answer.
The best way to happiness is most likely an effort to remove all the hopes and longings, instead of trying to figure out how to achieve those.
This universe is a lot about finding how our everyday perception is wrong and incomplete. We keep peeling the reality and the reality keeps shrinking.
The search for ultimate reality may well end up in an absolute void, something so void, we can't even imagine.

Sunday, November 15, 2009

QQ

Read over your compositions, and wherever you meet with a passage which you think is particularly fine, strike it out.
- Samuel Johnson
Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.
- Napoleon Bonaparte
Speech is conveniently located midway between thought and action, where it often substitutes for both.
- John Andrew Holmes

Sunday, November 08, 2009

Tomorrow or Today?

Sometimes in life, we want to be so cautious, we almost stop living it. In the overly meticulous attempt of making the future pain-proof we take insane amount of pain for today. Is it not really fool of us? May be I am not as good a foreseer as many others, but I think this is something we really need to give a second thought at - sometimes.

Saturday, November 07, 2009

Universal

It's all the same. Differences are only superficial. In space and in time.

There is no start. There is no end. Start and End are probably among the top most misleading intuitive expectations we have.

All boundaries are subject to and entirely dependent on interpretation.

Cloudland State Park

Click here to view these pictures larger

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Is there a limit?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/apr/04/taliban-flogging-inquiry-pakistan

Friday, October 30, 2009

Breezing through.. too fast
Trying to catch it
Chances


What is real?
What is beyond interpretation? Is there anything at all?

Concepts. Mathematical, Geometric.

Effects.

QQ

The significance of man is that he is insignificant and is aware of it.
- Carl Becker

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Trying (forever) to accept Meaninglessness
Deeply puzzled
A bit Relaxed
A bit Hopeful

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Points to Ponder

"There's an expiry date on blaming your parents for steering you in the wrong direction"

-JK Rowling Harvard Commencement Speech - June 5 2008

Sunday, October 11, 2009

Thoughtful
Kind
Puzzled
Uncertain
Waiting

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

What a Wonderful World

Deeply frustrated
Extremely Angry
Tensed
Very much afraid
Greatly confused
Filled with Guilt
Lonely
Sad
Restless
Very Stressed
Hopeless
Failed
Aimless

Monday, September 28, 2009

QQ

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
- Barry LePatner
The goal of all inanimate objects is to resist man and ultimately defeat him.
- Russell Baker

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Perspective

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. - Abraham Maslow

Saturday, September 12, 2009

We and our brains

No human thing is of serious importance. - Plato

The brain is a wonderful organ. It starts working the moment you get up in the morning and does not stop until you get into the office. - Robert Frost

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

What not to do

I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. - Bill Cosby

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Into the Unknown

The further I go,
The longer it gets.

I never reach.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Do Not Take It Easy.

Nothing is easy. And nothing should be taken easily. Everything matters. Everything is serious. Take it easy is the worst thing to say.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009

4 simple statements

1. Morality, ethics, sense of right and wrong, good or bad ====> No real existence

2. Consistency or presence of laws in nature is probably a property of existence. Anything that exist in a plane (or domain) has to have consistency with the other objects of that plane (or domain), with respect to whom it exist.

3. Existence itself is the closest thing to the concept of God. There is probably nothing more beyond that.

4. An existence that exist to itself as well, is life.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Dynamics of Mind

Like a car we need to drive our mind. As we can not drive a car on the road haphhazardly without the risk of accidents, so is the case with our mind. The level of freedom we get in our thinking world puts us under enormous possibility to think otherwise. We take it almost granted that it's ok to think whatever we want to - that in thinking there could be no real danger. In the land of imagination, we can wander about aimlessly without the fear of any harm. The only difference we appreciate is: if we think smartly, we might be able to achieve more. This is true. But it's only part of the whole picture.

The important fact that we miss here is, we think we can change the direction and context of our thinking in zero time. It seems to us that we can think of anything at anytime without any major effort. This could not be further from the truth. The notion of freedom in our choice of matter of thinking is illusionary. Like a car we can not suddenly change the direction or the speed without losing the momentum or getting into an accident. Surely, there can not be an one to one mapping between a car running on the road and a mind wondering in thoughts. This means, it is probably true that we have more flexiblity in our minds, to change the subject and the rate it changes at, than a present day car. But that difference is certainly not infinite. In fact, it's quite smaller than we can apprehend at first. The flexbility and speed of our thinking mind can change very rapidly in short term, but it's very hard to do the same in long term. Mind does have it's own momentum and like the momentum of a physical body, it also resists changes. Change in mind too, thus requires proportionate application of force, no less than a car or a physical body does. The difference is only in our inability to see it, not in actuality.

Driving a mind is more challenging and engaging than driving a car by many orders of magnitude. We do not drive cars constantly. But we do think at all time. We know when to refuel our car and how to do it, but little is known to us, how we can keep our mind strong for the task it has to complete. Physical food can not be a complete replenishment for the decay of our mind. We need something intellectually revitalizing and refreshing. We seldom appreciate that.

All these facts only indicate a higher chance of mishaps in our mind. And ironically enough, we know very little about how to recover from a 'mind crash' as well. Our knowledge about the dynamics of our mind are as poor as our readiness to address the recovery of probable failure. Mind is our greatest asset as human beings. Yet, we perhaps couldn't care less about it. We need to change. Surely.

Sunday, August 09, 2009

Liked this one

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Thoughtful Quotes

Everything you can imagine is real. - Pablo Picasso